Very entertaining piece at NewWest|Missoula.
One of my ex’s was a member of a sensitive-new-age-mens’ group. After
he had been going to meetings for several months, I asked (it had
slipped my mind) what SNAMan 1’s wife’s name was.
Ex didn’t know.
I asked if he knew the names of any of the other women.
He didn’t.
OK, We are a different species.
Perhaps not knowing was actually avoidance behavior?
Being SNAG, they were afraid of being attracted, distracted, from their SNAG mission!
Ah, too many things to speculate about!
He insisted that they did talk about their relationships; they just never said their partners’ names.
my wife
the wife
she
my partner
whatever
I am reluctant to speculate …
But this is a practice completely unlike any that women engage in. I assure you.
I’ve noticed this tendency toward objectification — speaking in the classificatory instead of personalizing — among other men.
And, yes it is a bit odd to me as well. It is not “the wife” or the “girl friend” that does something. It is Sharon, or Betty or Cindylu. It is the mystery that is the other, especially the intimate other.
However, I don’t seem to notice it among men in the arts where the particular is important.
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